Jim Cogley: Reflections from Tues 9 Dec – Mon 15 Dec 2024

Wood You Believe

A seminar entitled: Getting the Past out of the Present – Healing our Damaged Emotions facilitated by Jim Cogley and Luba Rodzhuk will be held in the Edmund Rice Centre in Westcourt, Callan, Co Kilkenny on Saturday the 18^th January from 10 – 4pm. The cost will be €50 with refreshments included. This is the first such event in the area and in a venue that is ideal as a healing centre. Bookings may be made by phone or text to Jim Maher on 0861276649 from 10am – 12noon most mornings. As places are limited booking is essential, and you are advised to apply as early as possible. The postal code is R95RX83.

A Christmas charity Concert featuring Celine Byrne with local choirs will be held in Our Lady’s Island Church on Thursday 19^th Dec at 7.30pm. This will be on a first come first serves basis with donations divided between St Vincent de Paul and Mary’s Meals.

Tue 9th Dec – The Giving Tree

Charles Swindoll tells the story of the giving tree: When the boy was young he would swing from the tree’s branches, ate her apples and slept in her shade…But as he grew up he spent less and less time with the tree. ‘Come on, Let’s play’, said the tree. But the young man was only interested in money. ‘Then take all my apples and sell them,’ said the tree. The man did, and the tree was happy. He didn’t return for a long time, but the tree smiled when he passed by one day. ‘Come on, let’s play!’ said the tree. But the man, older and tired of the world, wanted to get away from it all. ‘Cut me down. Take my branches, make a boat, then you can sail away’, said the tree. The man did, and the tree was happy. Many seasons passed and the tree waited. Finally, the man returned, too old to play or pursue riches, or sail the seas. ‘I have a pretty good stump left. Sit down here and rest’, said the tree. The man did, and the tree was happy. Swindoll continues: ‘I stared into the fire, reviewing my life, as I grew older with the tree and the boy. I identified with both – and it hurt. How many giving trees have there been? How many people have given of themselves and their time so I might grow, accomplish my goals, and find wholeness and satisfaction? Thank you, Lord, for each one. That night I crawled into bed. I had wept, now I was smiling. ‘Good night, Lord’.  I was a humble man; thankful I had taken time to reflect’. 

Wed 10^th Dec – A Grateful Heart

The devotional book Springs in the Valley tells the story of a man who found a barn where Satan kept his seeds ready for sowing in the human heart. He found that the seeds of discouragement were more numerous than all the others put together, and he also learned that those seeds could be made to grow almost anywhere. But, when Satan was questioned he had to reluctantly admit that there was one place that he could never get them to thrive. ‘And where is that?’ asked the man. Satan replied sadly, in the heart of a person who is grateful. Gratitude is truly the greatest antidote for feelings of discouragement. Waking up each morning before we adjust our hair (if we had any!) it is far more important to adjust our attitude because gratitude is the attitude that sets the altitude for truly living.

Thurs 11^th Dec – Thinking and thanking

So important is the subject of thanksgiving in the Bible that it features in 138 passages. The word, thank and think come from the same root, reminding us that thanksgiving comes from thinking about our blessings. All too often we only appreciate having something when we have either lost it or are in danger of losing it. Helen Keller who was born blind and deaf once said that she had often thought that it would be a great blessing if every human being were stricken blind and deaf for a few days, some time during early adult life. Such a temporary affliction would make that person more appreciative of having sight and experiencing the joys of sound. Sigmund Freud suffered cancer of the mouth, and in 1926 developed heart trouble and spent time in a sanatorium. Upon returning to his native city, he said he experienced the glories of springtime in Vienna for the very first time. ‘What a pity’ he wrote ‘that one has to grow old and ill before making this discovery.’

Fri 12^th Dec – Thanks – In all circumstances?

One of St Paul’s words of advice was ‘in all situations to give thanks’. At first sight this seems a tall order and not very realistic but it does contain a piece of profound wisdom. My mother probably never read the Bible but this was a principle that she practiced in her daily life. We were small farmers on a farm that failed to prosper and was subject to lots of animal fatalities. Each one represented a serious financial loss. As a youngster I was deeply puzzled by her usual remark upon hearing yet another piece of bad news. She would say ‘blessed be the will of God’ which left me wondering what kind of God she was talking about! Now so many years later I can see that it was a foolproof means of getting on with life and not becoming bogged down in self-pity. It represented an attitude of resilience and faith that no loss was the end of the story and that ultimately all would be well.

Sat 13^th Dec – The One who said Thanks

One of the Gospels contains the story of the ten lepers that Jesus met up with. He healed all ten of them but only one came back to say thanks, and the narrative includes a note of surprise that this man was a Samaritan. As such he would have been regarded as a total outsider by the Jews, and someone who had no rights to any entitlements. His coming back prompted Jesus to say, ‘Were not all ten made clean so where are the other nine’? Here I may be reading too much into the story but my sense that this one individual who came to say thanks had found freedom and wholeness. The other nine who went away, perhaps felt a sense of entitlement and we know they were healed but to what extent they had become whole is questionable. It seems very likely that after a short time of being free of their complaint the years of their misfortune may still have been a heavy burden that was borne with a big degree of resentment.

3^rd Sunday Advent 24

This Sunday the 3^rd of Advent used to be known as Gaudate Sunday. Gaudate means to rejoice so it’s the day we associate with Joy, especially joy in our relationship with the Lord, in our Christian calling and in our Christian hope. Looking around the world at present there is lots of evidence of sorrow and mourning, but there doesn’t seem to be much evidence of joy. First let’s be clear that joy and happiness are poles apart. Happiness is dependent on something happening, getting something, meeting someone, or things happening in our favour. Happiness by its very nature is always fleeting and the object of our happiness doesn’t usually deliver what it promises, or certainly not for very long. Theres a department store or is it a brand called NEXT and that word captures the essence of happiness; it’s always in the future with the next object or achievement.

Because we are so dependent on external things or events to make us happy the unhappy state of the world can make us feel very unhappy. In recent years I have had to seriously restrict the amount of TV I watch because I find that there is only so much bad news I can take, and to be a minister of good news I have to keep my spirit light or else I too would become bad news and there would be no joy in me to share with anyone. This has been one of my big lessons in recent years, that to lift others up I have no option but to stand on higher ground. In my foolishness I used to think that the only response to so much misery around me was to become miserable myself. Not I see that in so doing I was only adding to the misery of the world.  When I first realized this, it felt like I was being selfish, but I also knew that to take on board too much pain and suffering, I would be putting my health at risk, and probably shortening my life. I now appreciate that the spiritual life involves taking active steps to ensure that nothing is allowed to disrupt or destroy the peace that resides in the inner sanctuary of the heart.

So now I look to what it is that creates more joy in my life. The Bible teaches that there is more joy in giving than receiving so I am trying to cultivate a greater spirit of generosity. I find great joy when I sell some books and can put the money towards someone who is sleeping rough and for whom a small caravan makes all the difference. This happened during the week with a man who has been sleeping in pig-sty conditions for two years and even had his few belongings of a tent and sleeping bag stolen quite recently. To know that someone like that had a roof over his head the night of the big storm was for me a real source of joy. I find that with money in general; it’s like seeds that when we give, it always comes back in abundance, and a big part of what comes our way is pure unadulterated joy. Also, like seeds when we hoard them, they go musty and becomes useless. One of the things I would love to see more of here is that we become a community that is associated with generosity of spirit at every possible level. It’s there in abundance already in the amount of volunteering of time and service that people give, but there are so many areas that generosity of spirit can be extended. The generosity of God towards us is something we are called to mirror both as a parish and as a community and it has nothing to do with having a healthy bank balance.

There is I believe an inexhaustible source of joy deep down in each of us. However, it’s like a well that so much mud and debris has fallen into or been thrown into, and all this foreign matter needs to be cleaned out before we can be in touch with that inner spring of life that is also the source of our joy. There is a perception that it is only when we are in some kind of crisis that we need counselling, and many wouldn’t dream of going to anyone unless they were on their knees. This is unfortunate because the essence of counselling or psychotherapy is to clear the well so that we experience joy and new life. Each one of us has a story with parts of that story that we are not comfortable with. Childhood issues can cause us to behave very childishly in adult life. How many have known alcoholism in the home and being ashamed, still give the impression that everything was or is fine? There are so many who grieve a loss that they have never come to terms with. Even after decades of abuse revelations, lots have yet to come forward with their story and like to think that what happened to them was of little consequence compared to the more horrific stories we hear about.

Could I knock this notion about counselling on the head that it is only for when we feel like the hen looking at the scrambled egg, there goes my crazy mixed up kid again. Instead, is something that we could all benefit frombecause we all need someone to confide in and someone we can talk to and when we do it makes all the difference.

Twenty years ago, it was a requirement for training in psychotherapy to go to a counsellor on a weekly basis for four years. Looking back now, it was one of the best things I have ever done. I know that to go to someone with whom you can bare your soul to, initially takes courage and might mean swallowing a fair amount of pride. Yet the benefits far outweigh any initial inconvenience. What are those benefits you may well ask? Well might I suggest them to be just some of the following:

An entire new outlook on life and what it’s all about

Having better self-esteem and improved self-confidence

A renewed sense of vitality and zest for life

Not being nearly as ruffled and upset as you used to be

Looking ten years younger with better health

Being in touch with much more joy in your life

Those are just a few that come to mind, so if any of you are thinking of going to someone, my suggestion is, don’t hesitate, and if you don’t click with that person, find someone else, but in the end of the day it’s an investment in yourself and your future and well worth it.

Mon 15^th Dec – Count your Blessings

One of the lessons learnt by Victor Frankl during his time in the concentration camp of Auschwitz was the importance of counting your blessings, even when they are painfully scarce. He wrote that prisoners in camp dreamt about certain things more than anything else, like bread cakes and warm baths, the things we take for granted. It was while in prison that they began to appreciate beauty as never before. In one poignant paragraph he wrote: If someone had seen our faces on the journey from Auschwitz to a Bavarian camp as we beheld the mountains of Salzburg with their summits glowing in the sunset, through the little barred windows of our prison carriage, he would never have believed that these were the faces of men who had given up all hope of life and liberty. Despite that fact – or perhaps because of it – we were carried away by nature’s beauty that we had missed for so long.